DFW break-up letter

[squirmelia]

I only just read about the break-up letter that the (former) girlfriend of David Foster Wallace received (in February). She stopped reading at page 20. I doubt I would have stopped reading, although when people have broken up with me (or I've broken up with them, or if it's been a mutual break-up, or if we weren't even really "together" in the first place) they have never written 67-page letters, so I cannot tell. I think they definitely should have, and it is a shame that it would be inappropriate to demand such a thing in retrospect. Maybe I should have dated DFW, since obviously dating him in the future, I would spend all my time wondering how long the break-up letter that I might receive would be, and indeed, I'd probably try to get him to break up with me, just so that he would write the letter. Actually, why would I want a break-up letter of such length? Wouldn't it be better to want some kind of super-lengthy love-letter instead? Although that might mean I'd actually have to love him (or want him to love me), and although he is a famous author and such, I have to admit that I don't actually know him, and am not in love with him. Although if he is in love with me, then even though it might not be reciprocated, he should feel free to write to me and declare that he is no longer going to be in love with me, if that is how he feels. I wouldn't mind if he wrote me such a letter, I suppose. I'd prefer it if the fictional character, Lenore Beadsman in The Broom of the System wrote me a letter instead, just a friendly letter, no break-ups or not break-ups. It might have a small stain in the corner where she has spilt ginger ale over it, but that would be fine, she's probably not likely to spill anything.

Read about his break-up here.

Comments

[suzylou.livejournal.com]

So say you do date, and break up....how do you feel if you get less than 67 pages? :)

[squirmelia.livejournal.com]

Glad that you've broken up with them if they are not able to write such a thing? ;)

[verlaine.livejournal.com]

Clearly we have a new unit of scientific measurement - the milliwallace, being approximately equivalent to half a line of break-up letter.

I think I sent a love letter of approximately 250mw to someone when I was about 17, but I have been very lax since then.

[squirmelia.livejournal.com]

I think if there was such a scientific measurage, it would be different for break-up letters and love letters. Footnotes are of course vital in either case.

[toxicbunny.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I remember that article, and having similar thoughts - not only that I wouldn't have gotten bored reading, but also that if she gave up at page 20 she obviously wasn't the right person to be going out with DFW anyway. :)

[squirmelia.livejournal.com]

I am out of touch with news and only just read it. Maybe the way to tell if you should be going out with someone is to write them a 67 page break-up letter and see if they actually get to the end, at which point the letter self-destructs and you claim it never existed.

I used to write long letters to my friends at school, and I know they wouldn't read them all, since I used to insert important data at random points and would then see if they had noticed, and they didn't. Or maybe it just wasn't important enough / believable / questionable enough data, hmm.

[solitarywalker.livejournal.com]

Blar. You had me all excited that at the end of your post i'd be able to download 67 new pages of DFW writing... he's only my favourite living author, and it's been a damned long time since i've read anything new by him...

[watchingsitcoms.livejournal.com]

You do... know that it's a joke, right?

[squirmelia.livejournal.com]

Was it really 68 pages instead? ;)